4 Keys to Making an Emotionally Intelligent Money Decision
Do you often find yourself caught in the crossroads of a big financial decision and wondering, “What’s the right choice for me?”
Today, let’s dive into a topic I often discuss with clients:
How to make financial choices that aren't just based on the numbers, but feel right on a deeper level, and for the long-term.
For example, let’s say a client is wondering whether they should buy or lease a car.
What most financial advisors would say is to outright buy a slightly used car with cash.
Now, while that approach may be a good way to save money, is it really emotionally intelligent?
I’ve heard from clients, “Just tell me what to do.”
But that doesn’t really help people grow into mastery over money, so I can’t.
I provide options and recommendations and empower people to feel good about their financial decisions, so they can repeat the process over and over again successfully.
Because there are many factors that affect our financial decisions, and they’re not all just money-based.
These deeper factors, sometimes not always obvious at first glance, include our emotions, our feelings of safety and security, our needs, our sense of self-worth in the world, and our values.
The truth is, the most fulfilling financial decisions aren’t made in isolation.
They’re interwoven with our deeper feelings, needs, and values — and if we bypass them just to make a “good” financial decision on paper, we end up feeling less than fulfilled.
As a Financial Coach, while I think that saving money is a beautiful thing, my goal is to help you make holistic decisions that make you feel prosperous on every level — not just based on the numbers.
So how do we make an emotionally intelligent money decision?
You may have heard me speak about the 4 I’s of Financial Decision-Making.
Let’s dive into how to use them, practically.
I’m going to use an example to ground this in, but if there is a financial decision you’re contemplating, go ahead and apply the following steps, and see how much clearer and confident you feel afterward.
Let’s take the example of buying versus leasing a car.
1. Define Your Intention
The first I is for Intention.
Before diving into the numbers, clarify what you truly want, and your deeper why.
The car is a great example, because cars aren’t just about getting from point A to point B—they carry a lot of emotional meaning.
Do you want a vehicle that’s all about safety and comfort? Is it to take the kids around, complete your daily commute, or go on weekend adventures?
Is your intention to save as much money as possible? Or is it to have the least impact on the environment?
Do you want to feel abundant while you’re driving around? Or to never have to worry about the maintenance and service on it?
Take some time to define what’s most important to you.
Your intention will set the stage for your decision.
Write it down and use it as your guiding star as you start the decision-making process.
2. Gather Information
Next, roll up your sleeves and start gathering practical Information.
This step can actually feel so good and empowering!
This is what some call doing your due diligence.
Do some research on the options that align with your intentions.
Start by exploring the latest car models that fit your vision and values. What new cars are out there that match your needs?
Next, consider the price points and whether a used car might be a better fit for your budget.
Which options align with your intention?
Don’t overlook the importance of understanding current interest rates.
With today’s rates, the cost of a car lease or loan can vary significantly, so make sure you’re aware of how these rates will impact your overall expenses.
To get a clearer picture, use tools like car lease versus loan calculators (such as BankRate.com) to estimate the total cost over time.
Input your likely purchase price and interest rate to see how your choice will play out financially.
This step is crucial for uncovering the true cost beyond your monthly payments.
This is HUGE!
Seeing the actual cost of the car over time if you choose to borrow or lease can be enlightening, to say the least. It could be tens of thousands of dollars in addition to the cost of the car.
Car dealers might present you with monthly payments, but they won’t give you the full financial picture.
Be proactive — calculate the total cost yourself so you can feel clear and empowered.
And of course, test drive the cars you’re considering to get a true feel for them!
3. Trust Your Intuition
The third “I” in making emotionally intelligent decisions is Intuition — the inner compass that guides you beyond the numbers.
This is your gut feeling.
Or as one of my clients says, "how it feels in your bones."
And it’s not willy-nilly or woo-woo: it’s about tuning into your core sense of how a decision truly resonates with you.
After you’ve clarified your intentions and gathered all the practical information, take a moment to listen to your gut feeling.
How does the option feel in your body?
For me, my intuition will show me a path that has more light than the other options.
This step is about assessing the inner knowing and fulfillment that the numbers alone can’t capture.
Your intuition is a powerful tool that helps you gauge if something feels right at a deeper level.
If you rely solely on intellectual analysis without listening to your intuition, you might end up with a choice that looks good on paper but doesn’t bring you genuine satisfaction.
I often say this third I is the most important because it has the power to lead you to a choice you’ll be truly happy with in the long run.
4. Invite Perspective
And if you so choose, there is a fourth and final I, which is for Invitation.
You can invite others into your decision-making process.
Talk to friends, mentors, your Financial Coach, or advisor.
Their insights can offer valuable perspectives and help you see the decision from different angles.
Sometimes, a fresh viewpoint can make all the difference.
Reach out to those who’ve recently navigated similar choices and ask them about their experiences.
What did they value most? Was it the financial savings, the joy of driving the new car, or perhaps the safety of a reliable vehicle?
By following these steps — Intention, Information, Intuition, and Inviting perspectives — you’ll make decisions that are not only financially sound, but also fulfilling on every level.
This is key to reducing regret (something that’s very common with financial decisions), and instead engaging in a process that helps you feel emotionally connected and resourced, so you can make a decision you feel truly good about.
So I wish you the most prosperity possible, and if you’re going to buy or lease a new car, I hope that this helps you tremendously!